What is Poly?

The dictionary did not have a definition of the word Polyamory, but from French, “poly” means many or multi and “amory” is a derivative of the French word “amour” meaning love. So therefore if you put the two words together they mean, “many loves.” The basic definition then is the loving and sharing of more than one relationship.

As Robert Heinlein said, “The more you love, the more you can love — and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”

Here is a definition from the website of The Polyamory Society

Poly n or adj 1: many or several 2: Short for Polyamorous 3: The relationship orientation of people who love and want to be intimate with more than one person at a time 4: A relationship that is non-monogamous relationship 5: A person that is either in or at least interested in a multipartnered relationship and family

Polyamorous is a term used to describe people who are open to more than one relationship, even if they are not currently involved in more than one relationship. These definitions are broad and somewhat loose, in order to encompass the variety of poly relationships out there. The loving of more than one individual can include emotional, spiritual and sexual aspects of a relationship.

Is poly for you? This is a question only you can answer. Polyamory requires the consent of all involved, so be sure of your current relationship before you just decide you are poly. Be aware of the problems of polyamory and be secure in your feelings. Just be HONEST to those you are involved with and yourself as well!

There are common problems that arise in poly relationships that I want to address. This is from my point of view. It is how I feel about these issues. I am hoping that my experiences will help others in their poly relationships.

© within Reality: danae 2001 – all rights reserved

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